Ant Farm's 2008 My Dripping Wet Pussy Award

This year’s winner of Ant Farm’s vaunted Dripping Wet Pussy Award is Chinese Labor Watch. Operating out of a New York headquarters, but maintaining an “information bureau” in Beijing that somehow has been allowed past the gates of the city and rolled within the midst of the sleeping and unsuspecting legions of Party bureaucrats’; CLW has remained secreted within, breaking out in a mighty host of lawyers, and letting more in. Not even the crafty Ulysses could perform such a feat, but Ilium was sacked and so have they sacked Beijing, not once but several times in court! Amazing! No, Breathtaking! Homerical! The very stuff of myth and dream! One needs to rub one’s eyes.

Other mere mortals have routinely ended up in Dis for attempting such hubristic political stunts as these in Communist China. Yet, they have marched with Myrmidon force (go ants!) all the way from New York (that’s in America, right?) to meddle in the affairs of the Communist Party, and show them who is the laoban. For this I applaud so hard I fall down from a cerebral stroke as if my skull were stove by the mighty Ajax himself. But come Read for yourself this heroic verse inscribed on their website.

Perhaps their Trojan horse is the fact that they attack foreign companies and not the CCP. How else could they have been let in? But being the legal nemesis of the Communist Party doesn’t come cheap. Where do they get the money for this? Only Tiresias amongst the Dead could say.

I severely doubt that donations from your average Zhou amongst the Chinese diaspora could provide them with the cash that would be needed to mount such an invasion. Could they be CIA backed, as the Ant suspects every prominent Chinese dissident (group) in exile is?

Let me be as Helen to Agamemnon, and provide for you, reader, a viewing from the fortress walls of the heroes before us. The CLW team consists of three Chinese, one of them from Taiwan. Western educated at elite secondary institutions, blah, blah, blah, while reaping the fruits of residing on Western shores and dodging the misery of real day to day life in China and Taiwan, yet all the time playing a charade that is down right manipulative. The Ant has decided to call them on it.

As a strong-minded liberal I know liberal-pabulum-puking-brats when I see them (they must’ve got some of that melamine laced formula recently, and I’m really sorry about that). They play the liberal fiddle to suit their own little dance, and their sonata is called Travesty.

If I am wrong about China Labor Watch, then so be it. They’re receiving one of the highest awards that AF can afford, aren’t they? A wet pussy is nothing to sniff at.

Congratulations, you three clowns. You correctly bathed this dirty cat, but then you didn’t dry it properly. It’s only gotten dirtier.